by Rav Avraham Vasserman, Community Rabbi in Givatayim, yeshiva.org.il, translated by Hillel Fendel.
What does it mean to be a traditional Jew, as opposed to an orthodox observant Jew? There are many answers, but most "traditionally," the way it developed in the Orient amongst Sephardic Jews was the following: Faith in the G-d of Israel, belief that He gave the Torah to Israel at Mt. Sinai, belief in the concept of Divine reward and punishment, and respect for Halakhah [Jewish Law]. In their world, rabbis are greatly respected and are invited to important occasions, while family connections are warm and important. At the same time, the Halakhah is not fully observed, and families might go for a Sabbath drive to the beach after the father and sons return from synagogue. There is a comfortable openness towards those who are not observant of Jewish Law barely at all, even if the parents might sigh in regret that their children are not as traditional as they would have liked them to be. Often, when something substantial happens in their lives, they might take upon themselves an additional mitzvah, such as lighting Sabbath candles or wearing tefillin.
This way of life is not an ideology, but rather just the way they are. Sometimes people even express the wish to be more observant, but "my spouse doesn't agree," or, "it's too hard to commit." This is a style that appreciates Jewish religiosity while not feeling bound by it, and it has much beauty and positivity, especially in its openness to different degrees of observance – including even those who are very religious.
Most unfortunately, in recent years there are those who have been trying to reframe this "traditional," practical way of life as a methodological ideology that declares openly that Halakhah "means nothing to us." Nothing could be further from the truth.
In essence, the reframing is a type of Reform – not vis-à-vis Orthodoxy, but of traditional appreciation of Judaism. "Our way of life has nothing to do with religious life," these reformers paraphrase what was once said by certain Zionists about Zionism. This attempt to impose agendas on the large mesorati (traditional) public in Israel, on the large sector of grandparents and parents who recite Kiddush and Grace after Meals at their festive Sabbath meals – together with their children who do not normally do so – is nothing more than cynical advantage-taking of their good hearts. The vast majority of mesorati Jews in Israel want nothing to do with such a (non-)relationship to Jewish Law and to Jews who are more or less observant than they are.
Rav Kook (d. 1935) lived in a generation when many Jews abandoned their Torah beliefs and lives. In his profound analysis of this phenomenon, Rav Kook explains that one of its reasons is that it is hard for many people to find G-d in detailed laws, such as not cooking or making a phone call on the Sabbath. They still seek a connection with G-d, however – in the belief, sometimes, that this will be an even deeper connection. It is manifest partly in the "short cut" of being a good person, helping others, honoring parents, kissing the Torah scroll in the synagogue, and believing that G-d wants the best for all of us.
Rav Kook then goes a step further, and explains that this is basically the influence of Christianity. Though this sounds surprising, it is a fact that many Christians believe that what determines whether they are "saved" in the Next World is whether or not they believed in Jesus as their savior – and not necessarily their deeds in This World.
That is, man wanted an escape from legalisms, and therefore created a different spiritual and religious ideology. But in his desire to remain connected to the original divine revelation and to eternal life, he came up with a twist in the plot: He turned the Torah into the "Old Covenant (Testament)," one which still exists but is no longer relevant. Instead, goes the claim, there is a "New Covenant" which no longer requires the laws of the Torah, but still believes in the Creator and His supervision, reward and punishment, and more. This new covenant emphasizes the ethics and morality of the Torah, in place of its laws and other teachings, even though the latter includes within them all of the former. This is precisely the problematic issue caused by stealing the lights of the Torah and detaching them from the practical mitzvot.
Some readers will yell out: "Are you calling these good Jews, Christians?! Have they instituted a new religion?!" Of course not. But it is important to know the common denominator between them, and that is the desire to throw off the yoke of the law. The Christians chose the idea of a new revelation, while some Jews went with a pick-and-choose attitude towards the mitzvot, keeping some and rejecting the others.
Don't worry: Saba and Savta [your grandparents] will always be happy to welcome you, even if you come by car on the Sabbath. But don't dress them up with agendas that they never considered.